Questioning Everything Disney Little To Much

Archive for December, 2017

Why Did Elsa Get Away With It?

Disney's Frozen Snow Monster

One of the primary messages of Frozen is the importance of love between sisters. Love is (spoiler) what breaks both the curse of endless winter and cures Anna’s frozen heart. It also makes us all feel warm and fuzzy inside. Almost fuzzy enough to forget the numerous times that Elsa has either directly or indirectly tried to kill her sister. The first is mere minutes into the movie when young Elsa slips and falls and ends up launching an icicle at Anna’s head. Later on, Anna won’t stop hounding Elsa to return to Arendelle and ends up receiving an ice blast in the heart for her troubles. Both of these are considered accidents and therefore semi-excusable. Elsa is simply not able to control her powers. We get it. We feel for Elsa….we understand being told to ‘conceal don’t feel’ and then removed from contact with the outside world was not the best course of action her parents could have taken. We are all Team Elsa. And then she creates the snow monster…

Elsa creates a terrifying, demonic beast not on accident or even to protect herself, but to simply hasten her sister’s departure from the ice castle. Wasn’t that a little overkill? Couldn’t she have just created some super long ice slide home or something? Did she really need to forge something so malevolent and terrible that would not only chase them out but ultimately try to kill them? As much as I would like to, I just don’t think we can chalk this up to Elsa’s fear or lack of control. We’ve all seen that she can manipulate her powers pretty well even before she figures out the whole love thing. Don’t you remember her perfectly sculpted ice stairs, ice dress and the intricately designed ice castle?

Then at the climax of the movie, when Anna sacrifices her life for her sister, it would only make sense that Elsa would apologize for the multiple murder attempts. But, no! She doesn’t even mention it! She gets off scot-free by simply removing the winter that she originally caused and then makes an ice skating rink. So then why is Hans the villain? He only tried to kill Anna once…maybe one of the things that Elsa shouldn’t have let go of was taking some responsibility for her actions.

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Fan Art Tuesday


God The Sultan was an Idiot

I think we can all agree that the Sultan just might be the worst father ever. It’s obvious that he is a terrible judge of character (ie. Top Advisor = Jafar), but did you notice how quickly he gives away his daughter to a complete stranger? Granted he has been frustrated by her inability to choose a mate thus far yet does that make his decision any less terrible? I mean, a guy comes in on an elephant from who knows where and he is ready to pawn off his daughter for a magic carpet ride? Come on man!

aladdin-jafar-et-sultan

And Jafar is the one who questions Prince Ali’s credentials…of course he had ulterior motives but shouldn’t Jasmine’s father be the one doing the detective work? Who knows who this ‘prince’ really is after all…he could not be a prince at all…he could be a homeless guy pulling off an elaborate hoax with the help of a half naked blue man…far stranger things have happened right? For shame Sultan. Maybe Allah should have forbid you should have any daughters. Sheesh.

And don’t get me started on having a full grown tiger as a pet.


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Fan Art Tuesday


The Enchantress: The Other Villain of Beauty and The Beast

When anyone asks who the villain of Beauty and the Beast is, the first and most obvious answer is Gaston. But is it really him? Certainly he is a self-absorbed, chauvinist pig who uses the loose legal standards of his time to his own advantages, but I just don’t think he is the main bad guy. Who is? The beautiful Enchantress of course. Now, this character is not technically in the movie save for a few stained glass images of her featured at the opening of the movie. How could she be the villain if she isn’t even in the story? Well let’s take a look.

beautiful enchantress beauty & the beast

There is a lot of this story that is told during the voice-over prologue. The Pre-Beast Prince is cursed because he refuses to board a beautiful Enchantress who is disguised as a homeless beggar trying to pay her way with a rose. Looking at just that from the outside, I think the he made a sound decision from the facts presented to him. To me she sounds crazy and does not have the makings of a good house guest.
But it’s when you understand the timeline of the story and see that the Prince was only roughly 11 years old when this went down that you really start to see the Enchantress for who she is. (Ref: The rose he received post-curse would bloom till his 21st year & per Lumiere they had been ‘rusting’ for 10 years when Belle first arrives.) Now I don’t know why the 11 year old prince is answering the door for strangers, but I do know boys that age do not always make the soundest of decisions. It seems like a potential lifetime curse for him and hundreds of servants may not be the proper punishment for this crime. Who made this Enchantress judge & jury anyway? And the whole set up seems to be weighted against the Prince…almost like she wanted him to fail so she could show how powerful she was. If she cared so much about the Prince’s heart, where was she when the curse was broken. Shouldn’t she have been there congratulating him at the ball?
So I ask you, who is the true villain? Gaston, who takes his crush a little too far or the beautiful terrible Enchantress who curses hundreds of people because a prepubescent child makes a poor decision. I say the latter. What do you say?

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Fan Art Tuesday


What If?

I’ve been letting this one formulate for a while. I’ve been able to watch this movie enough times to believe that this theory has some decent foundations. There are no shortages of posts floating around the internet about the plot holes in this movie. However, I think that the theory I am about to lay out might solve almost all of them. What if the trolls were behind…. everything?

Let’s start at the beginning . Elsa has just nearly killed Anna and the King & Queen rush to trolls for help. This signals a previous relationship between the royals of Arendelle and the trolls. What kind of relationship isn’t clear but we know that the King only turns to this group because the trolls are fluent in the workings of magic. Not only does the Troll King understand Elsa’s powers completely, he is even able to heal Anna & even change her memories. But then, the Troll King has a chat with Elsa. He shares with her that her magic has the potential for great beauty and great danger which further exacerbates the situation engendering fear in both Elsa and her father.  So why didn’t the Troll King just tell them then that ‘Love’ was the answer? Instead he gives a vague command to the King that he must help her learn to ‘control it.’

Let’s look a little more at the character of the trolls. We see early on that Kristoff is ‘adopted’  by one of the female rock trolls. She surprises him and Sven and states that she is going to keep them. While cute and endearing, we only seem to accept this because it appears young Kristoff is without a family. But that can’t be true. How is he working with the ice-farmers or feeding/clothing himself and his reindeer? Possible, but I don’t know.  Then later when Anna and Kristoff visit the camp for help, the trolls ignore the urgent need and instead join in the song that culminates with a wedding being performed on the two helpless humans. Kristoff informs them during the song that she is engaged and their response speaks volumes. They scheme: ‘So she’s a bit of a fixer upper. Her brain’s a bit betwixt. Get the fiance out of the way and the whole thing will be fixed!‘ They couldn’t care less about what Anna wants or even what she needs as she slowly freezes to death right in front of their eyes. They are solely focused on hooking Kristoff and Anna up.

The trollsBut here is where it all sealed for me. Up until the point of the movie when Anna returns home half frozen, Prince Hans has been nothing but a gentleman. He is helpful, caring and heroic. I mean he smiles when he sees Anna walking away when they first meet. And not a “I’m gonna kill you and your sister and my plans already set in motion.” smile. But a genuine sweet smile. Anna wasn’t even looking at him anymore, so why would he bother smiling? Yet when Anna asks for him to save her with a kiss, he reveals that he has been evil all along…but what if that wasn’t him talking? What if the trolls got to him first? Instead of going back to sleep after Kristoff & Anna left, what if they went to ‘fix’ the situation? We know that they could perform magic on the brain and we know that they have a way of doing what they want. So would it be too shocking if they beat Anna back to Hans, cast a spell on him turning him evil just to get him out of the way? Once Hans was removed, there would be no reason Anna & Kristoff couldn’t be together. But why was that so important?

Theory: What if the trolls are concerned for Kristoffs happiness? And when they see that Kristoff likes Anna, they want him to be happy. So when they hear that she has a fiance, they decide to get the fiance out of the way in order for Kristoff to be happy. I think that Kristoff definetly does love Anna. Whether its true love or not is the question.

So what if Hans and Kristoff both loved Anna but the trolls put Hans under a spell in order to make Kristoff happy? What if what Hans felt for Anna was true love, and even though Kristoff loves Anna, Kristoffs love isn’t true love? What if Hans is stuck in his own mind screaming as he watching himself lose his true love by his own hands. That for him, the open door never closed and he still loves Anna. I mean what if the spell of the trolls kicked in just before he was about to kiss her and the kiss would have saved Anna but also possibly have freed Hans from his spell? And now, since he’ll never receive true loves kiss, he’ll spend the rest of his days screaming in his own mind, trying to break the spell himself so he can win Anna back and dying with every moment he’s under the spell.

What if the open door never closed?

And as far as the trolls knowing about the key to Elsa’s powers. I don’t know. I mean they may not have known. But if they did know, maybe there was a good reason for not telling her. Maybe she needed to discover it for herself. Not be told what to do but feel what to do to control them. This is all just my opinion but I feel like its a decent assumption.

Yes, this is a little far-fetched, but if we can believe that Hans can do a complete 180…why not believe the trolls caused it?


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Fan Art Tuesday


20 Uncomfortably Disney Moments That Might Be Sexually Suggestive

Were these on purpose or are we all just perverts?

Check out these 20 disney moments that might be sexually suggestive.

1. Based on Shang’s behavior, pretty sure this is a pick-up line.

2. Some mind-searing implications to that boast.

3. Damn Elastigirl, get it.

 

4. Well that’s a damn shame.

5. Look there’s scientifically no way to say “quiver” without sounding dirty.

6. Merry Christmas!

7. Pac-Man likes his ladies inexperienced.

8. Hey lady, no means no.

9. Disney needs to work on aging up characters before having them say shit like this.

10. Pegasus is inspecting the goods.

11. Lumiere is lucky candelabra can’t get syphilis.

12. Should…should we be seeing this?

13. This feels like a trick question.

14. And this is definitely a trap. Nice try, Chris Hansen.

15. RUDE.

16. Mulan is 800% done with Mushu’s bullshit.

17. Yzma no.

18. Literally just realized Hades is Megara’s pimp.

19. And that Mole was trying to proposition* Kida.

20. Awkward. Shhhh. Just stop talking.

Errr..You know it.